The Messy Emotions

In my childhood memories; I became In my childhood memories; I became irritated, angry or hurting at any random moment. My guilt that consumed me throughout my years of turmoil. I thought I had learned to bury the nightmares, all that were against my soul. I had not realized this behavior consumed me for years. I have guilt and trauma that has taken year’s of my life to rise above from within me, as if it were yesterday all of my life had happened. It’s as if I’m living all the hurt and pain from my past all over again. As if I could not control nor understand what was happening to me thirty years later. I wonder when it will subside. When will it stop? Will it ever stop? Will I ever become accepting of my life, myself, the past that I can’t change?irritated, angry, or hurting at any random moment. The guilt that consumed me throughout my years of turmoil. I thought I had learned to bury the nightmares, all that were against my soul. I had not realized this behavior consumed me for years. I have guilt and trauma that has taken years of my life to rise above from within me as if it were yesterday all of my life had happened. It’s as if I’m living all the hurt and pain from my past all over again. As if I could not control nor understand what was happening to me all these years later. I wonder when it will subside. When will it stop? Will it ever stop? Will I ever become accepting of my life, myself, the past that I can’t change?

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