Husband #1 is when my life was directly impacted emotionally & physically with domestic violence.

I had a good idea what happened to mom growing up when my father hit her. I was right year’s old when I first heard the arguing, the sounds of slapping & punching a person. Then the day came when I came out of my room to see my dad shoving my mom causing her to fall in the hallway. I had no way to process what was happening. My parents screamed at me to go back into my room, which I did. I felt as if I had some fault in their fighting because I was screamed at. This occurred until I turned 13 years old. I suppose it became learned behaviors. That is why I tried to stand strong against my husbands, at first. This only made my physical beatings worse. Yet my hatred grew so huge inside of me I wanted to hurt them back.
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